Today i have an admission to make. I have failed to follow my own advice. Last year was a roller coaster year. It started on January 1st when I lost my Dad. We were not close that last few years but not because I didn't want to be. My dad was just a hard man to get to know and he lived in his own little world. He did not invite many people into that world.
After losing my Dad, I decided to make my life count. I started this blog and I began my journey to become a better me. Over the next few months, I lost 53 pounds by just controlling diet and exercising slightly more. During the first six months of the year, I lost more than weight. I lost my Dad, my boss, and a good friend all in the span of a few months. I was more determined than ever to keep up what I started.
In August, the next blow hit me. I was taken off of blood pressure medicine and the next week, my Dr. called me back in for blood work results: Diabetes. Blood sugar 425 and an A1C of 14! I was floored but I was determined not to let it be my downfall. The next visit was in November. WIth a small dose of insulin daily, I was able to reduce my sugar to normal levels and my A1C was at 7 in just three months. My doctor was happy but I wasn't. I had gained back 25 pounds and was now having more problems with my knee due to the excess weight. A month later I was sent to the Nephrologist to look at excess protein inmy urine. Now I have a definite damage to my kidneys.
The pain in the knee kept me from exercising as I used to and the insulin made me hungry all the time so it was difficult to lose the weight back off. For 6 months, I have exercised little and feel like crap. This week I went to the DR. and the Nephrologist. The doctor still won't take me off the insulin and the Nephrologist says I have Stage 2 Chronic Kidney Disease.
The good news? My A1C is now 6.4! I am on a reduced dose of insulin and with Blood pressure control and continued Sugar control, I should not have to worry about progression of the kidney damage. n Still there is the nagging problem of the weight. Reducing the weight will lower my sugar and my blood pressure and that is a good thing. The issue now is to exercise through the pain in the knee to lose the weight and to lower my BP and hopefully get off the insulin completely.
I will do this because I have no choice. Getting worse is not an option. I choose to get better and I choose to do it on MY terms. See, even the most optimistic persons sometimes lose sight of their goals. Now I am back on track and I will get back to where I was last year before the bad news hit. I am confessing this because I know if I do, I am asking you to place me under a microscope and hold my feet to the fire. Will you? TODAY I CHOOSE CONFESSION!
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